*NSFW* Hey L.A., It’s Lauren. Can We Talk?

I was watching a YouTube clip from “Ellen” this morning in which this woman:

Robyn Lawley, who is either a size 12 or size 16, depending on whose account you’re reading said “I got called BIG, I got called HEFTY, it’s fine, I’m really confident and I love my body as it is.”

By the way, I’m trying to find an attribution for this image, but I can tell you it comes from an article for which the header reads “Would you look at me and say I’m fat?” And, I’m sure most reasonable people are reading this with the appropriate WTF-type reaction. Here is a woman who is exactly the average size for an adult woman in the U.S. having to ward off fat-shaming. Stupid Hollywood asshole media, right? RIGHT!

…except, I live in that world.

Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston is in the midst of studying why lesbians seem to have higher rates of obesity than their straight counterparts when the opposite is true of gay men. What interests me, beyond the broad conclusions that the study may or may not ultimately yield, is whether that paradigm holds true for Southern California, and other highly image-conscious localities. I definitely see how much gay male culture polices itself on things like fitness, but I would argue that lesbian culture around here is exactly the same way.

And, being thin is only the very beginning. We have to have the right relationships with cats, fresh local foods, and The Buddha. We have to work out, and do lots of yoga, and read lots of books, and be artistic, and linguistic, and work for social justice.

This is all cool stuff, but I am just not cool enough to even bother to write most of these people. (and, there’s no chance in Naraka that they’d ever write me.)

I just fed my kid microwave popcorn for lunch, for fuck’s sake! I’m hopeless!

The phrase that launched this post was one I read on a dating site this morning. The phrase was “Artisanal Hummus.” Artisanal hummus? Artisanal Hummus!

I mean, I’ve had artisanal hummus. I like artisanal hummus. I do! But, artisanal hummus came packaged in a profile which I have decided typifies an L.A. lesbian. I could have chosen a real outlier… someone who had several advanced degrees, or spoke five languages, or had single-handedly freed Tibet while keeping up a daily regimen of deadlifting a Prius filled with rescue dogs…. But I think this girl is a good view of what average looks like here.

The author, who looks to be about a size 4, discussed specific neighborhoods within L.A. that this person was looking to find someone in… okay, local is good. Who wants to drive all over?

Farmer’s Market asparagus was mentioned.

“Guerrilla peacefare,” to the extent that I understand what this entails, I’m all for that.

She works in holistic healthcare, and entertainment; and is leaning about orthomolecular medicine and wishes to do energy work.

She meditates and does yoga, and she sees these as undervalued in people’s lives. She seeks spiritual growth. She works out regularly.

I lifted this passage verbatim: “My focus this year is painting, freelance website design, creative writing – mentoring/co-writing on a few scripts (having a blast nerding out on Greek mythology, ancient religions/philosophies and witchcraft for research)….Regularly working towards manifestation of my future adventures….”

She is a gifted cook, a reader…discusses being like MacGyver in her ability to build Ikea bunkbeds by herself using pulleys and acrobatics.

She has an impressively precocious list of books, shows, music and food that she likes (mentions avoiding sugar/starch/complex carbs/gluten/corn/GMOs/non-organic foods) She also wants to ferment her own foods.

Kombucha (which I had to look up) is one of the six things she can’t live without.

She lists the specific exercise equipment she uses at home.

…and, I’m not even going to go into what she talks about wanting to find in someone.

Now, my point is not to say that I find this person unappealing. I think she’s fascinating! Many of the things she claims to be are things I’d be very interested in.

That being said, if I ever was able to secure a very captivating first date, I’m not sure that I think there’s a place for me in all of that living perfectly. I don’t need fixing, but I do need someone with the time and energy to care about me.

So, while it’s ever harder to find imperfect people like me, I will look as hard as I need to in order to find them.

Be well, my loves













Super quick men’s rights BS thing

This will not be today’s regular post, but this editorial made me feel icky. http://www.wwtdd.com/2013/11/boo-hoo-my-hot-english-teacher-had-sex-with-me/
Ok, so first off (big fucking surprise) an idiot misogynist wrote this. Immediately, that irritates me, because one of the prevailing problems with the MRM’s brain trust of douchebaggery is that, while they are happy to point out how often men are the victims of attitudes like this, THEY ARE ALSO THE PURVEYORS!

On a second level, am I the only one sick of hearing rape (statutory or otherwise) be classified based on how sexy the woman is in the story? I mean, we all know about the victim blaming around women who dare to dress some certain way, or whatever. As if to say, well, she looked hot, and any reasonable man would be completely unable to conduct himself as anything but a violent criminal.

But, here we have extended the same notion to the perpetrator: the woman’s attractiveness is the key to how ‘bad’ this is. Had the teacher been seen by the author as unattractive, would this then be rape?


Monday in My Life: Fantasia Hair

I’ve been getting bored with my hair. That happens about once a month around here. This time I decided to go back to bright colors. So, with the help of DW, I now have a lovely blend of aqua, purple and magenta hair.

We took Princess Toddlerpants (Babykiddo really is no longer descriptive) to Disneyland Saturday evening.I don’t know whether to feel better about it or not, but we don’t seem to fare any better with DW’s extra pair of hands, as compared with the results I get taking her alone. She was fairly difficult, but we got through about three good hours.

Princess Toddlerpants has been engaging in nightly psychological warfare with me. Last night, she woke me up at 3am ready to start her day. I was able to wrangle her back into bed, but every time that happens, it breaks my sleep mid-cycle. So, I end up with an amalgamation of catnaps through the night. It’s very reminiscent of those early days of two-hours feedings and whatnot.

I will admit, just as then, I like the closeness that she and I have, and that I seem to be the answer to what troubles her.

I just need some sleep 🙂

I’m not sure at all what the week ahead holds, but I am very excited to continue with our scheduled blogging experiment.

I really do need topics and questions and feedback. If you have any ideas, please hop in! What do you want to know about any of our topics? What do you want to know about me?


I did receive one bit of feedback, and it’s that someone liked hearing about The Keeper, and my USC friend.

The Keeper remains as busy as ever. She and I chatted briefly today, and I always feel very honored when she takes time out to acknowledge me. We have had some amazingly charged (in a good way) discussions about the exciting possibilities of accepting trans* visibility. She shared a scholarly article on the subject with me last week that had my brain doing new tricks. I learned today that she had opted to drop a class whose professor had engaged her in a feud-like battle of wits and wills over an idea she shared in class which didn’t fit his world-view.

My USC friend is traveling this weekend, and narrowly missed being caught up in the events of a shooting at LAX about an hour after she’d departed. I heard from her not long after I heard the news of the shooting, so I was glad not to have my stomach in knots for a significant period of time.

That’s the short version on myself and our main characters.

I hope you start your week in some wonderful way!

Be good to someone today… YOU! 🙂





From the Archive: Why Are “The Gays” So Special Anyway?

Originally posted (elsewhere) December 12, 2010

I have found myself engaged in numerous conversations, of late, in which I have felt compelled to defend the idea that LGBTQIA+ suicides, and the bullying that often leads to them deserve special attention.

The fact is, all bullying is abhorrent. No matter the cause. This campaign simply attempts to shed light on one specific facet.

This country has a very short attention span. We seem to move on from one issue to the next without ever really solving them.

Being bullied for being an outsider has been addressed. Am I the only one who remembers the coverage after the Columbine High School tragedy?  Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold killed 15 people and injured 24 others, purportedly as a result of being bullied.  There was great attention paid to bullying, and the ‘outsider’ status.  (I happened to catch a little bit of a break from being bullied in the immediate aftermath.)  The media attention focused on these teens as having been part of a small band of outsiders known as the ‘Trenchcoat Mafia.’

While we have no statistics on the incidence of suicide attempts among those wearing black trenchcoats to school, it has been shown (and I just went back and looked over my stats on this one) that LGBT youth (especially males, and those rejected by their parents say at least some of the numbers) Have a significantly elevated suicide risk. The numbers show differences of 300% to over 800% among the various demographics evaluated, as opposed to their non-LGBT counterparts.

Here’s the thing, though. As a member of the LGBT community myself, I think it is fair to say that many of us would be the first to stand up against the bullying of trenchcoat wearers. I would buy the tee shirt…attend the rally…call my elected representatives.

The bullying of any one minority is an offense against us all. Perhaps that is the real lesson. Call it Gay, call it Trenchcoat Mafia, call it Little Rock Nine. We all suffer when any one suffers. The idea of using our differences to divide is hardly a new one. But, rest assured…whatever the next group to be singled out is….I will be there to resist.

“They came first for the Communists, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Jew.

Then they came for me and by that time no one was left to speak up.”

-Martin Niemöller

Original Poetry: “I am All of These”

I love queer girls, because I don’t have to explain the appeal of a body and heart like one’s own

How it feels to come out and join our great, gay family, and yet…

To be disowned

to be a survivor, struggling with drawn claws to grasp the dignity which is afforded most without request

I love fat girls, because I don’t have to explain how much the world insists that we hide ourselves

how we vacillate between allowing and refusing to be policed by thinly-veiled bullshit rhetoric about health

that Loving myself is brave and subversive

to stand proud in my size 22 body, knowing that I would fuck me…  a lot

I love trans girls, because there is no one with a greater ability to deconstruct what being a woman really means

We will never birth babies.  Our forms may be forever odd and prolapsed, confusing partners and gawkers alike

But we know a different womanhood than those whose first bra came at 12 and not 30, We are fire-proven

to be radically unafraid, and say to that condemning delivery room doctor YOU ARE MISTAKEN

I love poly girls, because Hearts can be too big for one

We have great big arms, and great big tables, and great big listening ears

Our villages are warmly lit by the glow of generous giving

To refuse society’s fear, and give of ourselves as fully as we know how

I love nurturers, and counselors, andteachers andbestfriendsandsisters-in-armsandromanticsandcreativesandsillies, and those-for-whom-things-haven’t-been-easy, and 

AM   ALL   


Friday in My Pants, Vol.1 Ejaculation for Vagina-Owners

Wow! The first edition of Friday in My Pants, and I only got as far as the title before I had to make some language decisions. I will always try to use the most accurate and culturally sensitive vocabulary possible when dealing with matters of gender, sexual orientation, number of sexual partners, STI status, physical sex characteristics, gender history, etc. I absolutely want to be using language which anyone can read and not feel upset about. If my wording is in any way uncomfortable for you, I really hope you’ll reach out to me with an option you’d prefer.

With that out of the way, let’s set out on our first exploration: Ejaculation for vagina owners (with notes on parallel techniques for penis owners.) I will talk about the science, then the fun part!

The Science:
This is one of my favorite truths of human bodies: Almost all sex characteristics among those assigned male at birth have a corresponding part, and in many cases, a corresponding function to those of people assigned female at birth, and vice-versa. Bodies are much more similar than we typically consider them. In a lot of ways, this helps me feel better about my own (MtF) body.

I will likely get into some of the other similarities in future posts, but for now, let’s focus on the spongy, glandular tissue encircling the urethra. This structure and its potential function exist in those assigned male at birth and those assigned female at birth. (I was not able to find definitive information on this structure among people with various intersex conditions.)

In those assigned male at birth, we call this structure the prostate gland. During orgasm, fluid is secreted by this gland as a delivery medium for sperm. The tension and release sensations of this action are significant in the gratification of orgasm.

People assigned female at birth have this structure as well, and we call it the urethral sponge, or G spot. It is not well understood whether this glad itself, the adjacent Skene’s glands, or another location altogether is the source of the ejaculate in people assigned female at birth, but stimulation of the G spot is seen as the method for causing ejaculation. While ejaculate is expelled from the urethra (just as it is in those assigned male at birth), ejaculate is definitely not urine, and has very different chemical properties.

There is anecdotal information to indicate that post-operative transsexual women (MtF) are able to ejaculate as well. In (so many names exist for this, but I will go with) Gender Affirmation Surgery, the prostate gland is relocated along the anterior wall of the neo-vagina. (This places it in the location of the G spot in those assigned female at birth.)

Note: Bodies are beautiful, and what bodies do is beautiful. If you’re not sure whether you’re squeamish about this, you may find it useful to learn more about it, or simply choose another activity.

The Fun Part:
In addition to being a wonderful equalizer among differently-sexed bodies, ejaculation is probably my favorite way to give really intense orgasms to my partner(s).

*BONUS: This activity can work for people assigned male at birth by inserting fingers anally, and stimulating the prostate.

Here’s the How-to: As in the case of any sexual contact, it’s important to keep things safe and consensual. Rubber gloves can provide an effective barrier layer, if that is something you and your partner prefer. Additionally, I find that gloves can actually enhance the experience by providing a uniform surface texture which does not absorb lubrication like skin does. I happen to like texture of tattoo gloves like these: http://unimaxsupply.com/md/1glov/mg1330phantom.htm

This activity practically necessitates the use of a water-based lubricant (remember, silicone lube and barrier products don’t get along.) Even in the case of a partner who self-lubricates copiously, I would definitely suggest lube.

Protect the surface that the receptive partner is lying on with several towels, or a similar absorbent material. The amount of ejaculate can vary enormously. On the upper extreme, be ready for several cups of fluid…seriously.

Trust is always key, but it goes double if this is your partner’s first experience with ejaculation. It’s okay if it happens, and okay if it doesn’t.

Spend time making sure the receptive partner is relaxed and comfortable, and this is a must: The receptive partner should empty their bladder immediately before you begin.

Many people suggest that the penetrative partner should insert two fingers (index and middle) with the palm of the hand facing the ceiling (assuming the receptive partner is on their back.) This leaves the thumb free to stimulate the glans of the clitoris, if one is present. The typically suggested approach is to curl the inserted fingers in a “come here” motion stroking along the G spot (or prostate.)

(This paragraph only applies to receptive partners who are vagina owners.) I take a slightly different approach, which I have found produces stronger orgasms. I insert two fingers, and use my thumb to stimulate the clitoris, as in the typical method. But, I rotate my inserted fingers roughly 90 degrees and use the middle segment of my index finger to stroke the G spot. This does two things differently. It applies a larger, and more uniform surface against the G spot, and allows for additional stimulation using the finger tips along the Bartholin’s gland, located alongside the vaginal opening. Whether that has anything to do with it, I have no idea, but the 90 degree trick has been very successful for me with multiple partners, so take it for what it may or may not be worth.

Consistency is key. Try to use the same stroke over and over. As your partner gets closer to orgasm, it may be useful to go faster, but listen to what their body tells you. In those assigned female at birth, you will feel a distinct ‘grasping’ or tightening of the vagina as the body prepares to climax.

As orgasm nears, the receptive partner will likely feel a strong urge to pee. This is completely understandable, given the pressure of the fluids building up in their body, but be assured A. they will have just emptied their bladder, and B. it is absolutely normal and expected to feel this urgency when one is about to ejaculate.

The receptive partner should keep their body as relaxed as possible, and fight the impulse to clench and hold the fluid in. Likewise, it is not necessary to bear down and expel the fluid. An involuntary action of the body will release it at the time of orgasm.

When the receptive partner achieves orgasm, the best thing to do is probably nothing at all. Don’t withdraw your fingers, as this will change the pressure and may cut the orgasm short. Likewise, it is probably not necessary (or perhaps even possible) to continue to stroke.

A couple of things are possible at this point. Your partner may be completely finished and want nothing more than to bask in a great orgasm, or they may want to have another. While ejaculation does not seem to affect the refractory, or ‘reset’ period in those assigned female at birth (and even a very select few who are assigned male at birth) it is generally more taxing than an orgasm in which one does not ejaculate.

Take the opportunity after you’re all done (and the receptive partner has peed to minimize UTI risks) enjoy a moment being close to one another. The receptive partner will have been deluged with wonderful hormones like Oxytocin, and periods when this hormone is elevated can lead to profound bonding.

Whew! I feel like I need a cuddle after thinking through all of that.

Happy sex, my loves!

See you on Monday!


Here are a few great sex vlogs, if you’re in the mood 😉





BLOGtober Comes to an End

We made it! Thanks for those of you who took all, or part of the journey with me!

By blogging daily, I’ve seen an increase of over 50% in my readership over any other month since I started blogging in July 2011.

At first, blogging seven days a week did not feel like a fun thing, but I’ve really grown to like writing regularly, as compared to writing only when something major happens.

So, starting Monday, I have a new loosely-scheduled five-day format I’m going to test. See what you think…

Monday– My Personal Journal
This is just as it sounds. A wrap-up of what’s going on with me.

Tuesday– Reader Questions/Comments/Requests
Submit your questions or topics to serialnonconformist@gmail.com

Wednesday– Relationships (especially in terms of LGBTQIA+/poly issues)
This will likely be a combination of discussions about my relationships, and relationships in general. Also, I certainly do not feel like this has to be confined to romantic relationships. This can also be about things like friendships, parent-child relationships, and work relationships.

Thursday– Social and Political Issues
I foresee this being driven by social justice issues more than reports on governmental politics, though obviously, the two do collide at times.

Friday– Sex and Sexuality
Lots of things can be part of this: LGBTQIA+ specific topics, sexual health, technique, kink/fetish/BDSM, the psychology of sex, body image issuesI want this one to be question driven.

Obviously, if something is really pressing, I will break the schedule, and get to it the same day. I think, though, that this is a good balance, and doesn’t keep us on any one subject to the point of exhaustion.

I will be saving the “Infighting in the Poly Community” post for Thursday. I have a few responses from others in the community to draw from, as well as my own thoughts and experiences, it should be a good piece.

This will serve as today’s post, Tomorrow, I will be giving you a preview edition of the Friday sex post. I’m really looking forward to this one. People in my real life often ask me about sex and sexuality, I’m very excited to write about it.

My hope is that this becomes largely a two-way dialogue. I hope you’ll find that I have useful ideas about a whole host of things. When I don’t know about something, I can reach out to a network of friends which includes people with hugely varied life experiences, and professions. …and, if that fails, there’s always Google 😉

In all cases, though, I will give you my own take, filtered through my life and expressed in my voice. I’m so excited to set out on this new adventure with you!

Love ‘ya
Send me stuff! serialnonconformist@gmail.com

The MRM vs. Transwomen ***TW***

***TW: mis-gendering, strong trans*-bashing, transphobic violence***

In the primer, I shared what I felt was a useful summary excerpt from a very good article by Jaclyn Friedman. I also found some interesting reading on attempts to ‘rebrand’ the Men’s Rights Movement, in light of the negative publicity generated by… well, by speaking. Here is some of what I read: http://community.feministing.com/2013/02/25/mras-attempt-rebranding-as-mens-human-rights-activists/

But, what I just couldn’t pry myself away from was a post in “The Spearhead.” (seen as one of the “moderate” and “respectable” MRM drivel-spiggots)

I thought it was especially appropriate, given that I have been talking about transgender motherhood, I wanted to share a little gem with you from this past Mother’s Day. After I let the author, W.F Price have the floor, I will be back with some thoughts.
Here is the article, presented unaltered, with extremely strong trigger warnings:


A NY Times Mother’s Day Op-ed: Trannies are Equal Moms

by W.F. Price on May 12, 2013

When you see some kinds of articles, you start to understand why it was prescient women like Phyllis Schlafly who killed the Equal Rights Amendment. Men were pretty much in favor. I mean, what’s not to like about it? Under legal gender equality women would have to share all the crap that falls primarily on men’s shoulders. However, it should be pointed out that feminists, with a few notable exceptions, never supported it either. The version they supported included something known as the “Hayden Rider,” which preserved all female privileges and exemptions while granting women all of men’s privileges, i.e. the status quo.

But a brave, valiant minority is challenging female supremacy. Not patriarchal drones or supporters of male privilege, but men who reject everything about masculinity. Men who reject it so much that they chop off their genitalia and take female hormones in order to eradicate everything male about them.

One of these stalwart, self-mutilating individuals – a “former” male who goes by the name Jennifer Finley Boylan – has declared that he’s every bit the mother as any woman. Sure, he had children as a male, but that doesn’t mean he can’t now call himself “mom,” and demand they do the same. However, it isn’t only his kids who must call him “mother,” but all of us. If we don’t accept that he’s a mother, we’re bigots. Why? Because he has shared the defining maternal experience, which he puts down as “suffering.”

ONE day, toward the end of my transition from father to mother, I came home to find my 6-year-old son looking thoughtful. “Are you all right?” I asked.

“Yes,” Sean said quietly. He was playing with Thomas the Tank Engine. His favorite engine was No. 5, red James. That had also been my name, back before it became Jenny.

“What are you thinking?”

“It’s just it used to be you and me and Zach, the three boys on one side,” he said, “and Mommy and Lucy-dog on the other.”

“I know,” I said, feeling my heart clench.

“Now it’s Zach and me on one side, and you and Mommy and Lucy-dog over there.”

“I’m sorry, Sean,” I said. My voice was barely a whisper. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s O.K.,” said Sean. “The boys are just outnumbered.”

I have been a dad for 6 years, a mom for 12, and for a time in between I was both, or neither, like some parental version of the schnoodle or the cockapoo.


People have pointed out to me that, despite calling myself a mother, I didn’t give birth to my sons. They’re right, of course. But there is a lot more to parenting than birthing, just as there is a lot more to a novel than its opening sentence. After this long journey from an opposite-sex couple to a same-sex one, my wife and I can say it’s what comes after that counts.

I understand the reluctance many people have to play down the importance of gender, or for that matter, biology, in parenting; a world in which male and female are not fixed poles but points in a spectrum is a world that feels unstable, unreal. And yet to accept the wondrous scope of gender is to affirm the potential of life, in all its messy beauty. Motherhood and fatherhood are not binaries. And that, I’d argue, is a good thing.

Only a small percentage of American households now consist of married couples with children in which only the father works. The biggest outliers in our culture are not same-sex couples, or transgender people, or adoptive parents, or single fathers, but the so-called traditional American families themselves.

What does it even mean, at this hour, to call anybody traditional? Surely it is not the ways in which we conform that define us, but the manner in which we each seek our own perilous truth.

Pure self-indulgence of the most disgusting variety, and highlighted on Mother’s Day. I’d like to say it’s sacrilegious, but sadly it is appropriate. I understand why some of the most selfish, depraved men among us would want to relinquish their masculinity. In our society, women are free to pursue their heart’s desire without fear of sanction. Judging women for putting their own needs first is condemned in every mainstream outlet, from Dr. Phil to The Atlantic.

Some men are bound to be envious of this. Some of them go so far as to try to try to become a woman. And what kind of woman do they emulate? The worst parody of one. Gaudy, self-righteous, exhibitionist, attention-seeking, demanding, selfish and all too willing to place their burdens on others.

And in this great society we have built, it is they who stand at the pulpit and speak to the masses.



Let’s all just take a minute. Let your arms fall loosely at your sides. Draw a good, full breath, hold it a moment, and let it escape slowly from your mouth.

Okay. Are we good? Let me establish what I think are some parameters.
First off, I will never be able to educate Mr. Price.
Second, Many of you could probably write at least as good a response as what I am about to.

I am talking to those in the middle. The people who read that post and thought, “I can see both sides of this.” If you said that, I am talking to you.

I began this by writing a character assassination. It was disturbingly easy to find materials. But I don’t want to have to shoot every messenger who pollutes the world with this kind of hate. Thus, I deleted it.

I’d much prefer to appeal to your humanity.

Let’s start by establishing that Jennifer Finley Boylan is a person. She has feelings. She has a family, who also have feelings. One predictable outcome of Mr. Price’s insidious hate speech is that these people’s feelings would be hurt… profoundly. Who is helped by that?

Then we go out one layer to find people like me. People desperately trying to carve out a place in this world when the endless shouting of the W.F. Price’s of the world trying to take those places away… People like the ones who made this:

Go out another layer still, and find those who haven’t yet learned enough about transgender people to know what to think about us. Gosh! If it means male perverts in girls’ bathrooms, I’d better make sure those trans-whatchamacallits stay the hell away from my kids.

Which is just great!

In fact, why don’t we just round up all the transgender people and put them into internment camps, like Todd Kincannon, the former executive director of the South Carolina Republican Party suggested.

Oh, and remember that scary pervert in the girls’ bathroom that everyone is so scared of? Here she is:  Seriously. This is SIX YEAR OLD Coy Mathis. THIS GIRL, and others just like her are what people are loosing their shit over.

And, even if this was an adult transwoman like myself, we don’t have any intentions of causing trouble in bathrooms. We are far too busy being afraid for our own safety

Chrissy Lee Polis, 22, was viciously beaten by two teenage girls after allegedly trying to use the women’s restroom at the McDonald’s restaurant.

This may all seem like fun and games to you, Mr. Price, but I am paying for the real-life consequences of the hate that you invoke.

Too many of my sisters have paid a far greater toll…

In 2012, 256 transgender people were murdered because they dared to exist.

Here’s a Primer for Today’s Post

Excerpted from Jaclyn Friedman’s excellent piece “A Good Men’s Movement is Hard to Find” which appears here: http://prospect.org/article/good-mens-rights-movement-hard-find

The list of grievances for MRAs is long. It includes the elevated rate of suicide for men, educational discrimination against boys, economic and workplace conditions for men, violence against men, false rape reporting, fathers’ rights in custody battles, rates of male imprisonment and prison conditions, and the horrors of war. Many of these issues deserve a thoughtful response and the force of an organized movement for address them. It’s too bad that’s not what men’s rights activists are offering.

Case in point: Last month, AVFM and CAFE (the Canadian Association For Equality, an MRA group) held a “historic” rally in Toronto. Attended by a few dozen people, the rally featured speakers airing grievances about violence against men, and men’s unfair treatment in family courts, the workplace, and educational institutions. “Men matter,” the crowd cheered. One speaker, who was quickly ushered away from the mic, called for violent uprising against communism. But what was most notable about the rally was that not a single speaker proposed a solution to any of the problems they identified.


Looking Ahead

I’ll be rounding out BLOGtober with work today on MRM. I know we got a lot of that a week ago, but there are new developments, and you guys seemed to be really interested in the subject.
Thursday’s post will address infighting in the Poly community. I plan to do a questionnaire for this, as I did with the motherhood story. I like including the thoughts of a panel.

Have an amazing day, lovelies. I should hope to have the MRM stuff posted in a few hours, though those pieces always take extra time to research, because there’s so much nonsense to hack my way through.

Love you!